Read: Matt 9:14-34
“Do you believe I can make you see?” “Yes, Lord,” they told him, “we do.” Then He touched their eyes and said, “because of your faith, it will happen.” Then their eyes were opened, and they could see! Matthew 9:28-30
Jesus heals, brings back to life, and heals again based on people believing He could. When He was in His home town and the people didn’t believe, He couldn’t perform many miracles.
I don’t know about you but I struggle with faith. Especially around the topic of healing. I know that God does heal, and that He is powerful to heal. I have seen His miraculous healing power at work in my own body and in lots of other people as we faithfully pray.
At the same time, there are many people I pray for who don’t find healing. The ones who are healed give me faith that God is a God who heals. But if I’m honest, the ones who don’t get healed make me afraid to have faith. Not faith in God – I’ve seen too much to not believe in Him, but to have faith that He will heal.
And maybe that’s the struggle. Not that I don’t have faith that God can heal, but in each new situation I struggle with the faith that He will. Because He doesn’t always. Yet Jesus made clear there is a direct link between our faith and His healing.
What I’m not saying is that if you don’t get healed you didn’t have enough faith. But what the Bible does clearly lay out is that without faith healing doesn’t happen. It’s a confusing conundrum really.
Let’s just be honest – it’s really hard to keep our hearts open to and expectant of God’s wonderworking power, while not losing faith when our prayers are not answered the way we want. Especially in the area of healing. It’s like climbing back on the horse after being kicked off. The disappointment hurts. Yet if you don’t get back on, nothing is going to happen.
I suppose it would be emotionally easier to maintain a faith that didn’t have expectation for God to do God sized things, but that would be so far from the life, ministry and teachings of Jesus. Christianity would be a philosophy not a spiritual reality.
I may be the only one who wrestles with this, but if you can relate, let me encourage you to not lower your expectations of God, but to wrestle with your disappointment and take it to Him. In fact, what I have found is that God pulls me close when I am honest with Him. I grow the most in those times and my faith is strengthened even more.
Some will say don’t let those doubts enter your mind. Stuff them, ignore them, and don’t let your heart feel the disappointment… you just have to stand in faith and believe. While God wants us to stand in faith, He doesn’t want us to be inauthentic hypocrites.
God’s desire for you is that you would bring the real you to Him, doubts, heartache and all. That you would be honest with Him so he can heal those places in your heart, and build a wonderworking faith in your soul. Authenticity and intimacy with God is the pathway to healing, not faking it and posturing.
So if you are disappointed – tell Him. If you have doubts – tell Him. If you lack faith – ask for faith. God is real and able to handle all those things. If we’re real with Him, His healing power is released in our hearts and through our lives.
Jesus – I do believe, help my unbelief.